Psychologist Advises Children to Consider Therapy Early

The recent Netflix documentary “Babo – Die Haftbefehl-Story” has sparked significant debate. The film depicts Aykut Anhan, known by his stage name Haftbefehl, showcasing his success alongside his struggle with drug addiction. His wife, Nina Anhan, supports him throughout his battles, a fact many young viewers find admirable. However, psychologist Christian Hemschemeier offers a different perspective.

Understanding Co-Dependency and Its Impact

Hemschemeier asserts that the portrayal of their relationship in the documentary exemplifies co-dependency. This term refers to relationships characterized by one partner’s addiction and the other’s enabling behavior. He emphasizes that such dynamics are detrimental to both parties involved.

• Co-Dependency Traits: Hemschemeier highlights that co-dependents often feel responsible for their partner’s wellbeing.
• Childhood Influence: This phenomenon can stem from childhood experiences with addiction, leading individuals to subconsciously seek to “save” partners as a form of psychological resolution.
• Self-Neglect: Co-dependents often prioritize their partner’s needs over their own, resulting in a lack of self-care.

Psychological Ramifications

The consequences of co-dependency can be severe. Hemschemeier warns that romanticizing such relationships can cause emotional harm. He cites a metaphor about oxygen masks on airplanes: a co-dependent would prioritize helping others before addressing their own needs, leading to potential self-destruction.

He argues against glorifying loyalty in relationships that cause psychological distress. “No relationship should endure what is untenable, especially in cases of addiction,” Hemschemeier states.

Therapy Considerations for Co-Dependents

While Hemschemeier acknowledges the difficulties in leaving a co-dependent relationship, he believes that recovery is possible if the addicted partner seeks help. However, if addiction persists, it may be healthier to distance oneself.

Therapy can be beneficial for both the dependent and the co-dependent partner. “Kids often absorb the patterns of parental behavior,” he notes, emphasizing the generational trauma inherent in such dynamics.

The Influence of Social Media

Social media responses to the documentary often celebrate Nina’s loyalty. Hemschemeier argues that this perception is misguided. Younger generations, particularly since the COVID-19 pandemic, may desire stable relationships but should recognize the importance of mutual care.

• Situationships: These undefined relationships lack commitment, contributing to emotional confusion and insecurity.
• Self-Worth: Hemschemeier stresses that individuals must not lose sight of their own value in relationships.

The Need for Early Intervention

Hemschemeier encourages families in similar situations to consider early therapy for at-risk children. He believes children exposed to addiction are likely to continue the cycle of trauma if support is not sought. “Understanding the patterns early can help mitigate future issues,” he states.

Seeking Help

If you or someone you know is affected by addiction, professional help is available. Various hotlines and support networks can provide immediate assistance.

Germany:

Sucht & Drogen Hotline: 01806 313031

Austria:

Tel: 142

Switzerland:

Tel: 143

In conclusion, addressing addiction and potential co-dependency requires awareness and the willingness to seek help early. Fostering healthy relationships starts with understanding individual needs and mutual respect.